Most decks are accompanied by a few instructions or a booklet that explains what each card means. Read the instructions to get the most out of your deck. 

(Bet you didn’t think you were that progressive!). From now on, it’s you, Spirit, and this deck of cards—and together, you’re going to unlock some brilliant insights. 

(Altar, corner of your bedroom, bathroom, inside your car, seated beside an indoor plant or outdoor tree, etc.). Your spot doesn’t have to look like a yoga studio—but it has to feel slightly removed from your everyday life. 

As Einstein said, you cannot solve a problem with the same mind that created it, so by introducing physical distance, you’re representing the distance between the headspace of the problem and the headspace of the solution.

This moment can last all of five minutes, but it’s a moment with a distinct beginning, middle, and end. Some people like to call this a ritual (I do), but it doesn’t have to carry such weighted connotations. 

The moment just means getting into the right mode for receiving the message (so if you just got into a phone fight and threw your iPhone across the room, maybe take a beat before you angrily shuffle the cards). 

I can’t stress this enough: The beginning of this process is what separates a fuzzy card pull from a revelatory card pull. It’s the difference between pulling a card and thinking, “Hmm…that doesn’t quite make sense” to “OMG, that’s crazy SPOT ON!”

Even with five minutes total, the beginning should assume the majority of those minutes (think 3/5 if you’re timing it). 

Start by closing your eyes and holding the card deck in hand. (If you’re in a setting where closing your eyes is embarrassing or you just don’t feel comfortable doing that, no worries—keep your eyes open and just slow down your breath to signal a slight shift of energy).

Now’s the time to make this moment mean something! I like to ask (not out loud but in my mind) that this moment be of the highest good for me, for those around me, and that whatever comes of it will have positive ripple effects.

You don’t have to ask for those things, but perhaps think of how this card could have benefits beyond you. 

Now you get to (finally!) ask your question. Make sure your question is as specific as possible. For example, “What should I do for the rest of my life?” is a weaker question than, “Should I apply for this job?” They’re only cards, for goddsakes, so don’t expect some explosive cosmic unfolding with the flip of one card. What you’re going for is guidance on the next best step. That should be it.

Ask your question while shuffling and continue asking the same, focused question until you draw the card. 

A note about shuffling: There’s no one “right” way to shuffle the cards. You might be a Vegas dealer and handle the cards so gracefully that your hands are performance artists; or you may be so clumsy that every time you try to shuffle, some cards pop out and get warped in the process.

It’s all okay. The only thing you need to worry about during this moment is staying hyper-focused on your question and mixing the cards up however your hands can manage.

This is where crippling perfectionism intrudes. We wonder if we should keep our eyes closed or open. Should we use our right or left hand? Does the right card feel different than a wrong one? If cards spill out of the deck, is that a sign?

The inconvenient answer is repetition and trust. Each time you do this, you’re going to discover the times when you “nailed it” and times when you were off. Something I like to remember is that I’m in a thruple, so the three of us share the same goal of choosing the right card for the moment. Usually when there’s that much intention packed into a process, there's a higher probability of you getting it “right” than getting it “wrong.”

And if you start to feel like Goldilocks in this process, it’s because you are. You’re searching for just the right deck, just the right shuffle, and just the right moment for that card pull. This is a completely normal part of the process.description

There will be times when the card hits just right. What it says matches what you’re feeling or it’s revealing something you suspected to be true. These aha! cards tend to live from a higher vantage. They’ll validate how you’re feeling and they’ll provide an elevated perspective. It’ll feel like you’ve been seen and heard, and that you’re receiving gentle wisdom that’s removed from human drama. 

Occasionally, however, the card is less aha! and more meh. I’ve found this could be for a few reasons: 

a) You pulled the right card, but your ego isn’t ready to face the truth; 

b) You pulled the right card, but it applies to something that’s going to happen soon(ish), so be on the lookout, as the wisdom might come in handy; 

c) You didn’t properly set up the beginning (teacher shakes ruler), so your energy and pull were off. 

No matter if you picked a meh or aha! card, take a moment to thank Spirit and the cards for this moment. They are readily available for you any time, anywhere, anyplace, so thank them for their continued participation in this process. 

If your card pull was a slam dunk, rejoice in the process. Take a moment to internally celebrate or maybe jot some notes down in a journal. Bid farewell to your spiritual homies with a peace sign and “Until next time…”

If your card pull was off, this is your chance to pull a clarifying card. That involves returning to the beginning of your ritual and changing the question to something like: “I didn’t quite understand that card. Could you give me a second card to help clarify?”

Once you’ve pulled the second card, chances are the card is one of two things:

1) Completely unrelated to the first card and feels more accurate (that probably means your energy was off during the first pull, so trust this second one because you’re now vibing with Spirit).

2) Still baffling. Hmm…you might be having an off day. There’s the possibility that the card is revealing something in the future, but the higher likelihood is that your energy is too consumed with the problem, so it’s more difficult for Spirit and the cards to get through. 

When that happens, resist the temptation to pull a third, fourth, or fifth card (and possibly the whole deck) until you get a message that speaks to you. You won’t trust the card because you secretly know you gamed the system—and you’ll be developing self-doubt more than your intuition. 

Just do a hard reboot (like restarting your computer). Walk away and return after you’ve cleared some mental debris.